In a tragically common lapse in judgment I went to Mamma Mia on Wednesday night. I would rank going as the second stupidest thing I have ever done. Staying would be the third stupidest thing. (For those of you who are curious, you may ask me about the stupidest thing I have ever done, but it will be a very awkward conversation.)
For those of you who don't know, Mama Mia is a Broadway musical based on the music of the Swedish disco group Abba. When your concept starts with scoring a play from a bunch of halfway decent songs by a group that only made one decent song, you have problems. What is the result? Not good. They sang Dancing Queen not once...not twice...but thrice! (I don't know why they didn't include Disco Inferno. I like that one much better.) They attempted to fit a story in there but it was obviously an afterthought. The result was boring enough to bring a grown man to sobs and as about as funny as a tour of a slaughterhouse.
I started to think of any legal theories that might compensate me form my tragic loss. I could sue for loss of brain cells but no reasonable jury would believe I had them in the first place. Not being one to view an experience as completely useless, here are 3 things I learned.
1. In acting, having a foreign accent is a full-time job. Part-time accents simply don't work.
2. Flashing colored lights in the wrong combination can cause seizures. I must admit I wanted the distraction. Maybe having a seizure is kind of like hypnotism?
3. Broadway musicals are not targeted toward me or any other normal male. This was patently obvious from the amount of fabric on the men's costumes versus the women's.
Would I ever go to another musical? The answer is no, not without a good reason. And that good reason would never be found in the performance itself. The good reason would probably be of the female persuasion. They have mysterious powers to get me to do things that are completely out of character.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
5 comments:
I will second this, seeing how you sat next to me the whole night and kept putting your hand on my knee. I think you got a little too caught up in the undertones that were so well hidden in the impressive prose that is Mamma Mia. But seriously when you do sue them please add me to the suit. Does that make it class action. I want my two hours back. And I truely believe that we are dumber for what we have seen and heard. And thats science.
Oh and by the way the writing in Buffy was so exquisite that it alienates people with an "off" sense of humor like my EX-friend Whit!!!! (I still haven't forgiven you)
Now I'm dying to know what ABBA's "one decent song" is...
Actually, there may not be one. I prefer to give musical groups the benefit of the doubt even when they don't deserve it. Besides the members of Abba are still alive and may actually come up with one before its too late.
Matt AKA Buffy Lover,
Does that mean I am not your N anymore? If you don't remember what that is, then I guess I am not. I still keep up with the hip-hop just in case you are around so I could annoy you. Hope you are doing well.
Dust, I will get caught up, and read your posts and comments soon.
Matt, can I expect a note in 9 years?
Post a Comment